The question of is porn cheating can be answered differently. Usually, it all depends on the boundaries and agreements set in your relationship. But what if this problem suddenly arises when you’re already together? Or have you just faced the need to set new relationship boundaries and struggle if you want to tolerate porn or consider it as an issue?
This guide is for you. Let’s see all the cases for and against porn as cheating and determine the exact criteria for how to deal with it in your relationship.
Is Porn Cheating? 2 Cases For
Check out two arguments to support the affirmative answer to the question, “Is porn considered cheating?”
Married Couples: Sexual Inclusivity Violation
When you both vowed to “forsake all others” and took it seriously, you don’t doubt is watching porn a form of cheating. Because when you publicly announce sexual inclusivity at your wedding ceremony, you automatically violate it when you want other people.
This argument is huge — but not convincing alone, considering that three out of four therapists have dealt with watching pornography issues in their couples therapy. Even for longtime married couples, the debate is real, mostly due to the beliefs that “all men partook in consuming porn” and “it’s digital so it doesn’t really count.”
The latter belief is frequently referred to as a “slippery slope” argument, meaning that watching porn is different than visiting a prostitute; thus, you cannot be radical on whether porn is cheating.
But coming back to the vows and monogamy rules of a marriage, still, watching porn is cheating. If this argument is strong for you, then there is no room for discussion.
Because when you decide to tolerate it, it’s likely your partner will make a second move to test this boundary. And you’ll find yourself observing why they became “selfish and lazy when it came to our sex lives” and realize they “would have cheated on you whether [they] consumed porn or not.”
All Types of Relationships: Trust and Emotional Safety Violation
Even if you’re not in a marriage, watching porn can still hurt you deeply. The question of is looking at porn cheating hits harder if partners hide, ghost, and directly lie to their significant other on the issue. Even though there are some negative processes related to what does porn do to the brain, violating emotional safety in the relationship is not an excuse here.
Your comfort level with it in a relationship is what defines everything. Since watching porn inevitably tests the boundaries and trust in a relationship, it rarely passes as innocent and non-problematic for one of the partners.
Step 2: Find What to Watch Instead of Porn
Once you’ve eliminated your triggers, it’s time to make the first real step to change your life. Since porn requires only visual engagement to stimulate a bunch of hormones (including dopamine, norepinephrine, oxytocin, vasopressin, and serotonin), the easiest way to start replacing it is finding new content to watch.
To see more on the unhealthy effects of porn, check out our guide on what does porn do to the brain.
Possible alternatives to watching porn:
- Educational videos: Good if you’ve found a new skill to learn. Engaging with non-sexual content helps to break the circle of “when bored, turn on porn.”
- Documentaries or nature series: Observing real-life experiences helps you feel less emotionally dumb, get mental clarity, and be more engaged in everyday activities.
- Creative content: Consider joining the network for fostering social connections and emotional resilience
- Podcasts: Good to distract your mind and support learning and professional growth
Choose what to watch instead of porn based on your triggers, motivation, and interests. If you don’t want to dedicate any effort beyond watching, choose podcasts and nature series.
Step 3: Find What to Do Instead of Watching Porn
Not to turn your porn addiction into a binge-watching addiction, we need you to make one more step forward. This time, you’ll need to find what to do instead of porn to physically replace watching it with some new activity.
That’s why the new habit should be attractive (that’s the second law of creating a good habit): it’s better to genuinely want to do something as an alternative to porn because you’ll need to dedicate a lot of effort at this step.
Creative alternatives to porn:
- Journaling (Hal Elrod, the Miracle Morning author, made the whole morning ritual starting from everyday journaling!)
- Sketching, drawing, or painting
- Creative course: language, music instrument, cooking
- Home projects
- Crafting
- Photography and video creations
Releasing your creative potential will help you deal with boredom and feel more value in real life.
Physical exercises as alternatives to porn:
- Walking
- Gym
- Yoga (also good for mindfulness)
- Dancing (also good for social networking)
- Playing team sports
Sports release endorphins and reduce stress, which makes them a perfect substitute for porn.
How social networking is better than porn
Among all, meeting real people and building meaningful connections with them helps stop dreaming about imaginary ones.
Here are some ideas on how to make the first step in this direction and start sharing your inner truth:
- Call a friend
- Join a club
- Find a way to volunteer for your community
- Spend some extra time with family
- Practice gratitude (also good for mindfulness)
How to build mindfulness as porn alternative
Self-awareness and concentration should be present at all steps. If you lack it, here are some things you can try:
- Meditation (you can join a meditation app community, download a guided one, or just practice it in silence)
- Deep breathing
- Prayer
- Mindful living (paying attention to the present moment whenever you eat, walk, work, etc.)
- Listen to calming music and nature sounds (joining a sound healing class is a good idea to combine mindfulness with social networking and physical exercise)
Step 4: Build New Routine Around Porn Alternatives
Sustainable routine is the final step in our guide on how to replace porn. And it’s the most important one. Because this is where short-term avoidance tactics transform into a lasting, meaningful change for your life.
How to turn healthy alternatives to porn into your life:
- Make them visible: Use reminders and apps or place an attribute of your new habit in your room to clearly see how to start.
- Stack new habits into old ones: James Clear recommends clearly setting the sequence of events as an algorithm, “if…then.” For example, “When I finish breakfast, I wear my sportswear (instead of turning on my TV).”
- Find social support: Ask a trusted friend or find a new community to hold you accountable, do the new thing together, and track progress.
- Reward yourself: Start small, find a small treat (not porn, of course!), and acknowledge your achievements step by step.
Be patient! Replacing an unhealthy habit with a new one is a long process. But once you dedicate your effort to building routines, they will make your positive behavior automatic over time.
Don’t hesitate to start small—that’s the right way to compound a big change!
What to Replace Porn With: Trusted Resources
In this section, you can find sources through apps, guides, and porn alternative ideas to explore more and start your journey!
Porn Blocker App to Support You
A porn blocker is not technically a porn substitute, but it’s a great way to build a supportive environment in your struggle with porn addiction.
Canopy porn blocker uses AI to scan real photos and videos and quickly filter offensive content. While the page loads, it selectively eliminates the offensive content rather than blocking the entire webpage. And the best part is Canopy blocks porn on all web platforms and all devices.
The question of female dignity is also what makes the difference here. If a woman once had a debate with their partner and felt in her bones the hatred and irritation when realizing their significant other was attracted to another woman, there is no room left for debate. She just won’t tolerate lust over other women in any relationship status.
Is Watching Porn Considered Cheating? 2 Cases Against
Even though monogamy and emotional safety are strong arguments against watching porn, leaving it in a fantasy world and being open about the addiction can question porn as cheating. Let’s explore why it may not be that clear is pornography cheating in more detail.
Nothing Is Done Physically AND Emotionally
The ways people are watching porn are different: while some look at bodies, others get hooked by the sexual exchange between two people on the screen. In the latter case, they don’t feel anything for another person, and it blurs the consideration of is it cheating to watch porn.
In the contemporary Internet, it’s hard to determine what porn is. With so much partially naked and sexually appealing content on Instagram, Tumblr, and Pinterest, when is watching porn considered cheating? The new social norms have blurred a line between admiring someone’s beauty and desiring their bodies, and some may believe that not all cases of watching porn is cheating.
Given its active promotion among the male population, accompanied by social pressure and the politics behind porn production, chances are that your partner is totally disassociated from porn when they watch it. It’s like a bad habit: they are used to doing this, so they never question the benefits of quitting porn and that it can hurt their partners.
Fantasy Stays Isolated From Reality
It’s hard to decide is porn cheating when its impact stays solely in the imaginary world. Suppose your partner is successful in keeping their guilty addiction safe so it doesn’t affect their relationships with other people. In that case, it can be a valid argument against considering watching porn as cheating.
Some regular porn watchers admit they’re watching porn as a source of inspiration and knowledge expansion, relying on mutual agreement and, at times, mutual watching porn with their partners. It’s even more easily tolerated if both partners have enjoyed porn before entering their relationship and had an open and honest conversation about it.
The question of Is it cheating to watch porn is ambiguous here—but even for those who consider it normal, engaging with other people on OnlyFans, webcams, and hotlines is definitely cheating. Because this is how they violate the rules of fantasy and turn it into a reality.
Is Porn Cheating? What Scientists and Therapists Say
Scientists and therapists tend to consider watching porn cheating—or, at the very least, the symptom of future cheating possibility.
Lambert et al. study found that porn consumption can lead to infidelity. In the research, the participants who engaged in porn watching demonstrated higher likelihood to be unfaithful in a relationship. Also, they showed weaker commitment in their current relationship. All these findings support two key arguments for treating porn as cheating.
The international research studying the direct link between pornography and sexual satisfaction in a marriage states that it predicts “extradyadic sexual involvement,” or the key factor of weakened emotional and sexual connection between partners. This means that at a larger scale, partners who don’t question how to stop watching porn fail to keep their addiction in the fantasy world. Their partners feel something’s off.
From the therapeutic approach, the porn issue is frequently addressed as “a third partner” in a relationship and treat it as a physical trauma in their sessions. This underlines the severity of damage porn in relationships can cause for both partners.
So, is watching porn considered cheating? Based on the research perspectives, it’s hard to make this radical conclusion on this ethical matter. Nevertheless, they warn that this behavior is risky for the future of a relationship and for the well-being of a partner who is not engaged in watching porn. Thus, it should be addressed transparently and seriously.
Is Porn Considered Cheating? Let’s Find Your Answer
If you’re still not sure is watching porn a form of cheating for you or don’t know how to address this problem with your partner, use this checklist to find the answer:
- Are you married? Because if so, you can feel that their watching porn is a direct violation of monogamy vow.
- Did you tell you beforehand about this habit? If you’re already in a relationship and they are open about their watching porn proactively, it means they care about your emotional safety and trust. But if you’re the one who found they do it while they were hiding, you should treat it as a red flag, notwithstanding your perspective on is porn cheating.
- How do they watch porn? Do they obsess about the bodies or use it for any other reasons? Check both verbal and non-verbal signs to find the answer.
- How do you really feel about all this? Even if rationally you can agree that watching porn is normal, your body knows better. If you feel awful about the idea, you shouldn’t tolerate it. Prioritize yourself first.
In the end, it’s up to you and your partner to decide is porn a form of cheating or not a big deal. But the truth is, the moment you start doubting it’s OK you become more likely to feel resistance to this idea.
So, if you’re reading this guide, it means you’re already harder to tolerate porn and believe there’s nothing wrong about watching it.
Use Canopy Porn Blocker to Help Your Relationship
If you feel that porn is cheating for you but your partner is so deep in their addiction they don’t question is looking at porn cheating or struggle to quit watching it on their own, you can help your relationship with this small trick.
Canopy porn blocker uses smart AI algorithms to detect offensive content while scanning photos and videos online. It can detect and hide porn on a page without blocking the entire webpage, which reduces the tension of “you control everything” yet delete the content you feel bad about. And the best part is that Canopy works with porn on all the web platforms, so you can restore your peace of mind in one click once and forever.
Step 2: Find What to Watch Instead of Porn
Once you’ve eliminated your triggers, it’s time to make the first real step to change your life. Since porn requires only visual engagement to stimulate a bunch of hormones (including dopamine, norepinephrine, oxytocin, vasopressin, and serotonin), the easiest way to start replacing it is finding new content to watch.
To see more on the unhealthy effects of porn, check out our guide on what does porn do to the brain.
Possible alternatives to watching porn:
- Educational videos: Good if you’ve found a new skill to learn. Engaging with non-sexual content helps to break the circle of “when bored, turn on porn.”
- Documentaries or nature series: Observing real-life experiences helps you feel less emotionally dumb, get mental clarity, and be more engaged in everyday activities.
- Creative content: Consider joining the network for fostering social connections and emotional resilience
- Podcasts: Good to distract your mind and support learning and professional growth
Choose what to watch instead of porn based on your triggers, motivation, and interests. If you don’t want to dedicate any effort beyond watching, choose podcasts and nature series.
Step 3: Find What to Do Instead of Watching Porn
Not to turn your porn addiction into a binge-watching addiction, we need you to make one more step forward. This time, you’ll need to find what to do instead of porn to physically replace watching it with some new activity.
That’s why the new habit should be attractive (that’s the second law of creating a good habit): it’s better to genuinely want to do something as an alternative to porn because you’ll need to dedicate a lot of effort at this step.
Creative alternatives to porn:
- Journaling (Hal Elrod, the Miracle Morning author, made the whole morning ritual starting from everyday journaling!)
- Sketching, drawing, or painting
- Creative course: language, music instrument, cooking
- Home projects
- Crafting
- Photography and video creations
Releasing your creative potential will help you deal with boredom and feel more value in real life.
Physical exercises as alternatives to porn:
- Walking
- Gym
- Yoga (also good for mindfulness)
- Dancing (also good for social networking)
- Playing team sports
Sports release endorphins and reduce stress, which makes them a perfect substitute for porn.
How social networking is better than porn
Among all, meeting real people and building meaningful connections with them helps stop dreaming about imaginary ones.
Here are some ideas on how to make the first step in this direction and start sharing your inner truth:
- Call a friend
- Join a club
- Find a way to volunteer for your community
- Spend some extra time with family
- Practice gratitude (also good for mindfulness)
How to build mindfulness as porn alternative
Self-awareness and concentration should be present at all steps. If you lack it, here are some things you can try:
- Meditation (you can join a meditation app community, download a guided one, or just practice it in silence)
- Deep breathing
- Prayer
- Mindful living (paying attention to the present moment whenever you eat, walk, work, etc.)
- Listen to calming music and nature sounds (joining a sound healing class is a good idea to combine mindfulness with social networking and physical exercise)
Step 4: Build New Routine Around Porn Alternatives
Sustainable routine is the final step in our guide on how to replace porn. And it’s the most important one. Because this is where short-term avoidance tactics transform into a lasting, meaningful change for your life.
How to turn healthy alternatives to porn into your life:
- Make them visible: Use reminders and apps or place an attribute of your new habit in your room to clearly see how to start.
- Stack new habits into old ones: James Clear recommends clearly setting the sequence of events as an algorithm, “if…then.” For example, “When I finish breakfast, I wear my sportswear (instead of turning on my TV).”
- Find social support: Ask a trusted friend or find a new community to hold you accountable, do the new thing together, and track progress.
- Reward yourself: Start small, find a small treat (not porn, of course!), and acknowledge your achievements step by step.
Be patient! Replacing an unhealthy habit with a new one is a long process. But once you dedicate your effort to building routines, they will make your positive behavior automatic over time.
Don’t hesitate to start small—that’s the right way to compound a big change!
What to Replace Porn With: Trusted Resources
In this section, you can find sources through apps, guides, and porn alternative ideas to explore more and start your journey!
Porn Blocker App to Support You
A porn blocker is not technically a porn substitute, but it’s a great way to build a supportive environment in your struggle with porn addiction.
Canopy porn blocker uses AI to scan real photos and videos and quickly filter offensive content. While the page loads, it selectively eliminates the offensive content rather than blocking the entire webpage. And the best part is Canopy blocks porn on all web platforms and all devices.
Step 2: Find What to Watch Instead of Porn
Once you’ve eliminated your triggers, it’s time to make the first real step to change your life. Since porn requires only visual engagement to stimulate a bunch of hormones (including dopamine, norepinephrine, oxytocin, vasopressin, and serotonin), the easiest way to start replacing it is finding new content to watch.
To see more on the unhealthy effects of porn, check out our guide on what does porn do to the brain.
Possible alternatives to watching porn:
- Educational videos: Good if you’ve found a new skill to learn. Engaging with non-sexual content helps to break the circle of “when bored, turn on porn.”
- Documentaries or nature series: Observing real-life experiences helps you feel less emotionally dumb, get mental clarity, and be more engaged in everyday activities.
- Creative content: Consider joining the network for fostering social connections and emotional resilience
- Podcasts: Good to distract your mind and support learning and professional growth
Choose what to watch instead of porn based on your triggers, motivation, and interests. If you don’t want to dedicate any effort beyond watching, choose podcasts and nature series.
Step 3: Find What to Do Instead of Watching Porn
Not to turn your porn addiction into a binge-watching addiction, we need you to make one more step forward. This time, you’ll need to find what to do instead of porn to physically replace watching it with some new activity.
That’s why the new habit should be attractive (that’s the second law of creating a good habit): it’s better to genuinely want to do something as an alternative to porn because you’ll need to dedicate a lot of effort at this step.
Creative alternatives to porn:
- Journaling (Hal Elrod, the Miracle Morning author, made the whole morning ritual starting from everyday journaling!)
- Sketching, drawing, or painting
- Creative course: language, music instrument, cooking
- Home projects
- Crafting
- Photography and video creations
Releasing your creative potential will help you deal with boredom and feel more value in real life.
Physical exercises as alternatives to porn:
- Walking
- Gym
- Yoga (also good for mindfulness)
- Dancing (also good for social networking)
- Playing team sports
Sports release endorphins and reduce stress, which makes them a perfect substitute for porn.
How social networking is better than porn
Among all, meeting real people and building meaningful connections with them helps stop dreaming about imaginary ones.
Here are some ideas on how to make the first step in this direction and start sharing your inner truth:
- Call a friend
- Join a club
- Find a way to volunteer for your community
- Spend some extra time with family
- Practice gratitude (also good for mindfulness)
How to build mindfulness as porn alternative
Self-awareness and concentration should be present at all steps. If you lack it, here are some things you can try:
- Meditation (you can join a meditation app community, download a guided one, or just practice it in silence)
- Deep breathing
- Prayer
- Mindful living (paying attention to the present moment whenever you eat, walk, work, etc.)
- Listen to calming music and nature sounds (joining a sound healing class is a good idea to combine mindfulness with social networking and physical exercise)
Step 4: Build New Routine Around Porn Alternatives
Sustainable routine is the final step in our guide on how to replace porn. And it’s the most important one. Because this is where short-term avoidance tactics transform into a lasting, meaningful change for your life.
How to turn healthy alternatives to porn into your life:
- Make them visible: Use reminders and apps or place an attribute of your new habit in your room to clearly see how to start.
- Stack new habits into old ones: James Clear recommends clearly setting the sequence of events as an algorithm, “if…then.” For example, “When I finish breakfast, I wear my sportswear (instead of turning on my TV).”
- Find social support: Ask a trusted friend or find a new community to hold you accountable, do the new thing together, and track progress.
- Reward yourself: Start small, find a small treat (not porn, of course!), and acknowledge your achievements step by step.
Be patient! Replacing an unhealthy habit with a new one is a long process. But once you dedicate your effort to building routines, they will make your positive behavior automatic over time.
Don’t hesitate to start small—that’s the right way to compound a big change!
What to Replace Porn With: Trusted Resources
In this section, you can find sources through apps, guides, and porn alternative ideas to explore more and start your journey!
Porn Blocker App to Support You
A porn blocker is not technically a porn substitute, but it’s a great way to build a supportive environment in your struggle with porn addiction.
Canopy porn blocker uses AI to scan real photos and videos and quickly filter offensive content. While the page loads, it selectively eliminates the offensive content rather than blocking the entire webpage. And the best part is Canopy blocks porn on all web platforms and all devices.
FAQs
Is porn cheating?
The debate around is porn considered cheating is still open, and the exact answer to this is determined in each relationship separately. However, if you feel in your bones you don’t like it, you should be confident in yourself and consider porn as cheating.
What are the reasons of porn infidelity?
Regular porn watchers admit they enjoy expanding their knowledge and say it’s all left in the fantasy digital world thus it isn’t even real.
Why do some people question is porn infidelity?
A growing number of people feel the contrast between their body reaction and social norms. They deeply hate the idea their partners are watching porn but witness the conflict with today’s society that tolerates it as normal.
Is porn considered cheating by scientists?
In scientific research, porn is treated as the key reason for weakened commitment and sexual disengagement in a relationship. Also, they found a strong correlation between porn watching and future infidelity.
Is watching porn considered cheating by therapists?
The majority of therapists treat it as a real physical trauma in a relationship. This shows how deeply one’s porn watching can hurt their significant other in a long-term relationship.
